😃 Can Positive Psychology Help You Drink Better?
After two years of study, I obtained a certificate in applied positive psychology from the University of Pennsylvania. It's time to share what I learned (with a drink in hand).
A bartender walks into a classroom. Or, rather, an online portal. “Classrooms” are a little different these days, especially for returning students like myself. Classes can be asynchronous, taught through web platforms with occasional Zoom meetings. Of course, all the same assignments and tests still apply.
Either way, at the age of 47, I decided to go back to school. This was not an easy decision, as college is both expensive and time-consuming. But, as I transitioned from a bartender to a mindful drinking advocate, I realized I needed additional tools.
Over the past three years, I’ve been pursuing both a degree (BAAS) and a certificate in applied positive psychology (APOP) online at the University of Pennsylvania. Their positive psychology program was founded by Martin Seligman, the former president of the American Psychological Association and the father of positive psychology.
Recently, I earned my APOP certificate, which requires students to take four undergraduate courses (always the over-achiever, I took five) in positive psychology––Intro to Positive Psychology, Human Flourishing: Strengths & Resilience, Positive Psychology at Work, Understanding the Science of Positive Psychology, and Morality & the Good Life.
I figured it’s time I shared why I did.
Positive psychology is the scientific study of well-being. Like traditional psychology, it studies mental processes and resulting behaviors. However, traditional psychology has a more pronounced focus on overcoming adverse experiences, while positive psychology focuses on mental processes and behaviors that develop well-being.
Think about it as a gas gauge. Adverse experiences leave us on empty. Positive experiences fill us up. The goal is to get to a full tank and both disciplines can aid that process, one by fixing leaks and the other by adding fuel.
Positive psychology is the scientific study of well-being.
There are plenty of criticisms and addendums to the study of positive psychology, and sometimes it can be reduced to a kind of toxic positivity. If you want to see how a master of positive psychology navigates the criticisms and addendums, please read Darlene Marshall’s More | Better. Also, Carl Erik Fisher has done a great job of navigating positive psychology as a framework in addiction recovery in his Rat Park Substack. I’m going to write about it in a context much more appropriate to my scope.
Why would a bartender study positive psychology?
Putting aside the stereotype of bartenders acting as psychologists — trust me, we don’t want to be your psychologist, and you shouldn’t want that either — the simple answer is that I want my life to be the very best it can be. Making cocktails, which I’m good at, has always been a way to make people happy and provides me with a rich social environment, purpose, and a sense of achievement. It makes me happy, too.
But what exactly does that mean?
In positive psychology, the acronym for well-being is PERMA — Positive emotions, Engagement (flow), Relationships, Meaning, and Accomplishment — a theory created by Seligman. These are the things humans do in and of themselves to flourish. Flourishing is another way of saying happiness and refers to the Aristotelian concept of eudaemonia where our well-being is measured not in temporary pleasures but in a life worth living.
I’ve found an incredible intersection of bartending and positive psychology and thought I might take this moment, along with my newfound certification, to elaborate on the points of intersection.
“Other People Matter”
The co-founder of positive psychology with Seligman is Chris Peterson who condensed positive psychology into three words, “Other people matter.”
We’re social creatures, and what leads to our health and fulfillment more than just about anything else is having meaningful relationships. For me, that circles a number of letters of the PERMA model, my family and friends often bring me both meaning and a sense of achievement. Ask me what my greatest accomplishment is and it won’t be winning “Best American Cocktail Bar” or “Bartender of the Year.” I’ll answer, “Being a father.”
In my book Mindful Mixology: A Comprehensive Guide to No- and Low-Alcohol Cocktails, I wrote about the making of cocktails for other people:
Cocktails are delicious when they’re made with purpose and care. It’s not just a technique or recipe that makes a great drink—it’s an act of consideration; of love. If you wish a drink to taste perfect, you should shake one up with all that you’ve learned within these pages and then serve it to someone as an act of kindness or simply because.
Don't get me wrong: It’s great to make a drink for yourself and sip it slowly, savoring each and every taste. But the truest sense of being a bartender is to give. That’s what I love most about making drinks — giving to others — and I hope you do, too.
Character Strengths
Positive psychology devotes considerable attention to character strengths, a concept rooted in the comprehensive research of Seligman and Peterson. These strengths are drawn from both science and wisdom traditions and clustered in six categories: Wisdom, Courage, Humanity, Justice, Temperance, and Transcendence, with 24 strengths populating those clusters.
Temperance is perhaps the most important for drinking, which includes under its banner the character strengths of Forgiveness, Humility, Prudence, and Self-regulation. Within positive psychology, “temperance refers to the capacity to manage habits and protect against excess.” You may have also heard it in reference to the 19th-century global movement1 to reduce or eliminate alcohol consumption, but here I mean the former definition.
Temperance is often satirized as stern-faced preachers who want you to have zero fun, but the truth is far more complex. We must balance drinking alcohol with the reality of our values, goals, and health concerns to achieve flourishing. That’s the essence of mindful drinking, which may even help us deepen our experience by freeing us from compulsively reaching for a drink (see “Savoring”).
Savoring
Savoring is another key concept in positive psychology that relates to drinking. It’s a moment where you allow yourself to truly enjoy and explore the drink, environment, and company, taking in all of the sensations and appreciating it all in real time. Savoring is defined as “the capacity to attend to, appreciate, and enhance the positive experiences in one’s life,” and it can be applied to the past, present, or even the future.
When it comes to drinking, we often refer to this as connoisseurship — one of the four 'C' occasions for drinking: Celebration, Conviviality, Consecration, and Connoisseurship. There's a significant difference between gulping down shots and delicately sipping a fine Scotch or shotgunning a beer at a party and enjoying a cold, refreshing non-alcoholic beer at a stadium. It's all about taking your time and relishing the moment.
Flow
There’s more to this concept than simply keeping the drinks flowing. Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, a founding member of positive psychology, studied the concept of flow in our lives. Flow is a state of intense and focused concentration that arises from deeply engaging activities or interests—essentially when you get "lost in the moment." This state is important to our well-being and even sustainability.
For me, no activity has induced flow more often than bartending.
There were shifts where, by night's end, I felt as if I had awakened from a dream. During these fast-paced shifts, drink orders would come at me like cascading Space Invaders—shaking drinks, telling stories, pouring tastes, and wiping the bar top with barely a pause or thought. Those nights were incredibly satisfying, possible only because they existed in that perfect space between my skill set and increasingly difficult challenges. I loved rising to the challenge, and this is part of what made bartending so meaningful for me.
Meaning
Speaking of meaning — meaning is something we need as humans to flourish. However, it may not be as grandiose as you imagine. Meaning doesn’t have to be the belief in a god or a central life purpose, although it can be. It can also be small, meaningful things you in engage in everyday. Those might be your relationships or rituals.
Making cocktails is meaningful for me. In fact, I believe that it can be an act of service for others. When we make drinks for other people, we please the senses, calm the nerves, and create a greater connection. Though a touch romantic, David Embury (not a fantastic person but a huge influence on the cocktail renaissance) wrote:
The well-made cocktail is one of the most gracious of drinks. It pleases the senses. The shared delight of these who partake in common of this refreshing nectar breaks the ice of formal reserve. Taut nerves relax; taut muscles relax; tired eyes brighten; tongues loosen; friendships deepen; the whole world becomes a better place in which to live.
- David Embury, The Fine Art of Mixing Drinks
That goes for cocktails with and without alcohol. So often we assume that it is the alcohol itself doing the work when some of what makes us feel so good when drinking is the company and complexity of the beverage. Also, meaning can be a protective factor against harmful substance use.
Accomplishment
Earlier this year, I received an Industry Impact Award from Bar & Restaurant Expo (BRE). The award was presented to me by my peers, and the quality of the nominees was high. However, the reason this award was so important to me is because it validated my purpose—to make an impact. This award signified that I had accomplished that. The physical award and pomp and circumstance are irrelevant. Did I achieve what I set out to achieve? That’s what matters to me.
As humans, we want to know what we do matters. It doesn’t have to always be an award. It can also be mastering a certain skill or someone telling you they liked a drink you made for them. Achievement comes in many sizes. Such as, I achieved my APOP certificate. Woot woot! 🥳
There are many other significant concepts that positive psychology has contributed to the scientific study of well-being, including grit and gratitude. Those are likely ones you’ve heard of, and I encourage you to learn more. Both grit and gratitude have undoubtedly gotten me here today, but I’ll leave it here for now. However, not before clarifying that what I mean to say is…alcohol and cocktails are props. They can be delicious and a companion to our happiness, but they don’t always do the heavy lifting we think they do. We do that. There’s no “PERMA-C” model where cocktails are necessary for our well-being. Yet each facet of well-being can make cocktails taste better.
What positive psychology has done for me, more than anything, is lent a framework to something I already knew deeply but may have had trouble articulating. There is no single drink I have enjoyed as much as when I made it with skill, it meant something to me, I drank it mindfully, sharing it with people I love, and they told me that they enjoyed it when they did.
It reminds me of a quote from English writer and philosopher, G.K. Chesterton, “Drink because you’re happy.”
Or, in this case, drink because you’re flourishing.
Some helpful positive psychology resources:
Find out your character strengths for FREE at VIA Survey.
Listen to a Master of Positive Psychology (MAPP) Darlene Marshall’s Better Than Fine Podcast. 🎧
Read more on positive psychology:
Flourish: A Visionary New Understanding of Happiness and Well-being by Martin Seligman
A Primer in Positive Psychology by Christopher Peterson (textbook)
Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi
Grit: the Power of Passion and Perseverance by Angela Duckworth
Or practice one of the easiest and most fulfilling positive psychology interventions I learned in my classes: Random Acts of Kindness (RAoK).
Thank you to Oar Health for your important work and sponsorship of Positive Damage! Learn more about how Oar Health can help you drink less or quit here.
Congratulations on finishing APOP! You're such an asset to the PosPsych world and grateful you found us